Dark Sky...(Life)

It is a dark sky with a million stars

A rain storm ending in a bang

The truth that surrounds us

Unseen

without the plastered smile

Silence

releases us from the chaos

Madness unleashed

Finally we sleep

Let their be peace.

We can come together for a change or divided we will fall.

It's hard to get your voice heard when you feel other's don't want to listen. I have been talking to people for a long time about where our country is heading. It's a very scary slippery slope, and I am worried about our future. There are several issues that need to be reformed to better our world for everyone. I am not speaking for one class, but all classes. I also do not mean any slander to any race, or religous denomination. I only mean for everyone to have equal rights and oppertunities not only as Americans, but as immigarants coming into America. What is hard for me as an American born here is that many people that are not American are able to get more help then the people who live here. I believe that everyone deserves a helping hand, not just one race, culture, or religious bergade. If we are to have equality for all shouldn't we all be treated equally, that is i.e. each given the ability to have health insurance if we cannot afford it, or get a job, as well as the right to a good edu? I also want to let you know that I don't blame those that are reciving aid from our Goverment. I blame the goverment for not coming up with a better plan for everyone instead of just giving help to a few people. That is what we all are people, and all people deserve the right to a good Education, Health care, a safe place to live, and a safe work place in America. It is sad that these things still have not been accomplished in a country so rich. It is difficult when people who have money think that because they worked for it, it only belongs to them. (Not all people think this, and some people do give) It is the responsibility of the community, and the hummanity I would hope that people could have for each other that we could live in a world where we helped each other, and it wasn't based on a monetary value. It is sad that in our world this is what life is based on, material items. We all have something positive to give each other. If we really want equality things will have to change, people will have to forgive each other for past trespasses done unto the other based on Hate, and we will have to bring love into this world. The only way I can see this happening is if we all step down from our pedistals, and learn how to view the other point of view. We also have to give each other options and with the power of respect we can choose to disagree on very sensitive issues such as the horrid Abortion which always seperates us. I feel with Abortion there is no right answer both sides have great points. If you look at one aspect you can see a child's life being taken, the inability for it to become someone great, and be loved, or adopted by a loving family. The other point of view is a child who is unwanted and left in the foster care system, looked down on by his mother because he was a product of a rape, or suffering in poverty. These are all things that are possibilities, and don't say they are not. There are many perspectives and when you only see your own it hurts everyone. We all need to open our eyes, ears, and hearts to stand up for ourselfs in these coming years. If we don't stand up for what we believe to be right where is that going to put us, or our children in the next centuary? Do you care how our goverment treats us, the issues they feel they have a right to govern over us? What's more important wars, or education? Where are our tax dollars really going? How do we solve the problem of fuel for cars when if solved how will the poor get to work? They can't afford to buy new cars. It so saddens me that all these issues are not answered or even considered when changes are made. How will it affect everyone, lower class, and high class? Where will the higher class be when the lower class can no longer afford to buy and purchase the products the upper class provides? I could go on, I really hope someone understands that this is very important, it is not a joke! Do you care where your children or there children will be in years to come. Will they be able to go to college without having to give themselfs up to the miliatary services to keep from becoming in debt? I ask you to think think and don't hesitate to write to the goverment, band together as Americans, don't just stand by and Watch!!!! Do something!!!

TEN MUST READS RECOMMENDED BY ME.

These are books I have read in the past two years that have touched my heart, and soul. I think anyone would enjoy them. It is time for you to sit back, relax, read the list, and go find out if these books would also benifit you!


1. "The Five People You Meet in Heaven" by Mitch Albom. ( I have not seen this film."

2. "Legally Blonde" by Amada Brown ( I really enjoyed this book a bit more then the movie even though I watched it first.)

3. "The Last Book In the Universe" by Rodman Philbrick. (He also wrote "Freak the Mighty" great book.

4. "The sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" by Ann Brashares (Movie is enjoyable, but the book is a must read 1st!)

5. "Raymayana" retold by William Buck (I read this book for a Mythology class, and it is really enjoyable.)

6. "The Dangerous Lives of Alter Boys" by Chris Fuhrman (I'd heard about this book from my fiance's brother. It's a clasic if you ask me.)

7. " Under the Tuscan Sun" by Frances Mayes( belive me the book is better!)

8. "The Green Mile" by Stephan King (Words cannot express how axsome this novel is. It's not just scary, it's an emotional high, low, and inbetween.)

9. "An Egg on three sticks" by jackie moyer fishcher (One of my best friends recommended this novel to me. I just couldn't put it down.)

10. One of Oprah's books none the less...... "White Oleander" by Janet Fitch (The movie isn't bad, it's just they took to much out like so many films do.

These are books I have read over the last couple of years. Looking back to be honest, I need to start reading much more.
ARCADIA

My View on "V for Vendetta" The film

"V for Vendetta" is an amazing film that I urg you to go see. It is worth the cost of a movie ticket, and popcorn! The acting, the plot, the action, the tears, and feelings that it gives you take you on the ride of your life. Natile Portman makes you feel what her character feels and is so authentic. If you don't know what this movie is about I'll give you a quick over view. I don't want to ruin it!
Natile Portman gets involved with a man named V for Vendetta because he saves her from the Fingerman. The Fingerman are people who are suppose to protect people from each other if they go out after curfew they are to be fined, arrested, or even killed. The goverment is very controlling of it's people during this time, and use the plague of a virus that supposebly terroists leashed out at a school to control them. I don't want to go a lot further in detail because even the littlest thing could give it away.
I myself was glad I went in to this film knowing very little about it. When you are able to do this you can experince the adventure with the characters presented to you. Even though this is only a movie, it deals with things that play into our current events today. It's what could happen if things get out of control. My question I ask myself when speaking about our goverment, who apparently are trying to do the best for us, is it really "For the people by the people" anymore. Please if you can look closely at this movie, think, ananlyze and decide if you think that this movie is just that a movie, an idea, or is it more? I like to belive it's many things all in one. It moved me like no other film has in a while. If you have noticed there have been many controverisal films lately "Crash" is only one of them I can think of right now. The other I cannot spell, LOL. Please go see this film, and if nothing else enjoy it, realizing that it has been made, and what we still have for now, be grateful. (If you see this film you'll understand why I said this.)
Thankyou
Arcadia

GREAT NOVELS OPEN MINDS

Recently I was introduced to a great novel by the title of "RIVETHEAD" by Ben Hamper. If you are a normal everday blue collar worker you will be able to relate to Ben Hamper wether you have worked on an assembly line or not. This story is about a guy who never knew he was really a great writer! This book is so amazing! I don't want to spoil it. This is a true story boys and girls! A man grows up not wanting to work in a GM factory like his father, but circumstances lead him to the same and only option of work. Latter he finds himself writing for a paper called the flint voice discussing issues he and others have with the shop.

I really enjoyed this book. It made me laugh, cry, and very angry with the way things just are. Big bosses on top of totem pole, little people hit bottom, Big people get big bucks/Bonuses and the small people get an extra day off, or a commemorative mug, or cheap pin. I believe if American was really free, it would be balenced. We would all get our fair share. Why should someone who sits in an office all day get paid more then a factory, or fast food worker? What types of scrutiny does the employee have to deal with? What do the big overhead managers deal with, how doe these relate? If you look at it from my stance point the average employee on the bottom earns the money for the company, while those on top are the only ones to benifit from it. You make them the money and in return have to meet higher standards, as well as double the amount of money you made in the past. It is understandablet that the bigger profit you make, you'd like to exceed this, because their is always room for improvement, but look at who has to make the sacrifices, those earning a smaller wage, those who are trying to make ends meet, and that is the sad fact folks. We in turn have to work twice as hard to earn the same wage, and some of use without benifits. The only postive thing about being a factory work is that you do get benifits, but you still pay a price. Just read this book, and you'll have a better understanding of why.

The Cable Company is a Monopoly!!!!

Did you ever sit down and think about how much we pay for cable T.V.? Did you ever wonder why you only had one cable provider in your area? The reason is that the cable company is not considered a monopoly because of the satalite companies that also offer the ability to recieve more channels. I still believe that the cable company is a monopoly and this is why! The cable company is the only company that guarentees you those channels. Weather plays a large role in how clear your pictures are, or if your dish is blocked by a plane flying overhead, ect. you may not get any reception at all from the satilite, or the dish. Where I live we have one cable company, which name I cannot disclose for fear of being sued! This company is the only company we have to choose from that is cable, not Satilite or dish. This is a monopoly. It is also crazy that we pay for televison and cannot choose our channels. We are given a list of channels that come in a package. If we could choose our own channels, make our own packages people would be a lot happier. Then you are truly getting what you pay for. Right now at this moment we are all just getting what the company is willing to give us for a set price. We don't have choices, only the choices to get a pricier package so you can have the one channel you want from digital cable, or any other package that may contain that one channel with which you cannot live without. It is sad that our society has no voice!!!!!!!!!!!!! Speak up, and if you feel the same respond to this blog.

Thankyou,

Arcadia

Moving forward

The world keeps turning, and I keep moving forward. I guide myself saying don't turn your back to review past efforts or the results there is no time because time doesn't stop so I must continue like time ticking as the hours, days, years, and moments pass I must take what I can and learn from it. Althoough I would like things to be as they were I will never walk through those hallways, or corridors of my life again. They are gone, unexisting, but to say they don't matter would be wrong. That they haven't made me who I am, strong, persistent, ungoing, even when I feel it is the end of everything I still persist just like Rayona. I wish others could see me, I mean really see me, not just on the surface, but all of me like the world surrounding us, all of our perspectives, and cultures together. It is so important to respect the uniqness of everyone, but it is very seldom understood. We humans take little time to get to know one another, to really see each other. Then the time has dissappeared, and we are gone as well as the oppertunities before us. So please when you awaken to each and every morning think of the lives you are touching, you life, and pray you do the right thing for humanity as well as yourself. You are more then just one person. You are a part of everything around you. Remember "Good Ripples" don't keep them give them away.
Arcadia.

Quote of the day

I am happy even When I am sad......

Dig deep

The leaves flutter about doing a exotic dance while the wind bows down my neck. I admire the autumn display sauntering down the street. People in cars stare as if they never have to walk anywhere. I breath in deep the coolness of the air, smile, enjoying the sunshine as it rays bring me to life. Music radiates into my headphones out of my disc man. I take pride in myself struting down the street holding my head high. I let everyone see, right now in the sun I am somone.
Arcadia

JULIA WALDMAN... Post on Education

This post is from Julia Waldman, a very good friend of mine, she is going to be a great journalist someday!!! So listen up!

It has just occured to me recently that education is a hazard to a person's health. It can harm you mentally and physically. No other time of the year does a person get sick but when they are in school, no other time of your life will you learn to live on very little sleep despite the studies about students needing to rest more often. No one in school will ever be able to get adequate sleep when you have inconsiderate boobs teaching you and never realizing that you DO have OTHER CLASSES to attend to. Also, being that there are only 24 hours in a day and part of those 24 hours are consumed by classes and hopefully sleep it is almost impossible to stay in perfect health no matter what you do. I know I must sound insane for writing all this, but you've all been lead to believe that the more you go to school, the better it is for you in the long run. Think of this from the time you are five till somewhere in your mid-twenties you spend most of the year in a classroom. That's a good chunk of your life. For nut jobs like me who enjoy writing, it is almost impossible to sit through an english class and try to swallow what the teacher is spewing. Now how am I suppose to get any real subjects for my writing without exploring the world I share? But that just goes along with the destruction of creativity and the imagination in most students. I know this all sounds mad, but it is the absolute truth.
-j
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My last blog

My last blog was posted so Breadchic could also post this on her blog, I give her written permission!!!! Supporting the effort for EEF blogging for freedom.
Thankyou!

Passion, Expression and personal freedom...hope

When I was a child everything felt free. I could twirl around, run, jump, ride my bike, go for a walk, and I felt like I could not be defined by everything around me. I was in a balence one with the earth, the air, wind rain, and the completeness you feel without the need for money, only hope. I want to feel that way again to get lost in the clouds, the music, poetry, an autum day, or a cold invigorating rain storm that I would run through uninhibited by those around me. I yearn for this more then anything brinig the tear swelling to my eyes. The fears that creep up to my chest leaving a pit in my stomach when freedom is taking away. Money takes my freedom shoving it, stuffing it into a box that claims I must earn a certain wage to continue my intellect, or ability to gain knowledge. Every pay check pushed into my account towards college, loans that I don't want to take out continue to exist. The push and pull of take out a loan or give up everything you have ever worked for. The dreams I pushed aside to please those around me, my own doubt leading to my disbelief that I could actually be who I really wanted maybe even needed to be. Money is the control factor, it is what puts us into great fear. They hold it over our heads saying can you make it, will you win or lose? The ability to gain status through owning a home, an automobile, being married, our whole social society is based on this. What does it mean, it's not who we are, but it is at the same time. We are programmed to consume. We all buy into it even me. My DVD collection, my apt, my bed, my futon, my televison, these items own me. I am a slave to them like cable t.v. I am driven to have all the things my friends have! Then there are the people who are giving up their lives for a chance at an education. They choose to go into the Army, or other military forces. I'm not saying it's bad, it does give them a sense of purpose, but most don't have a choice. It's either boot camp, or they can forget ever going to college. I choose the harder root, paying my own way, moving at a slower pace then the rest. I am often looked down at by others for this, not my family or friends, but past teachers from high school. I would give almost anything to go back to a certain consular I had who said to me upon our meeting in my home town " What are you on the ten year plan" jokingly like it was funny and say right back to her Yeah I am unless your paying for it because it is my only hope of actually becoming someone, making a difference and getting my voice heard!!! I honestly don't know how I will ever be able to finish my degree, but I am playing it by ear. I am taking my chances now so I can help change the lives of children. I want to give them the chances I never had. I want to help them to know they can succeed, and not to allow anyone to hold them back, or to tell them what their potential is! A mind is a very powerful thing, this is why our freedom of speech is so important!!! It is hard though to believe in our world today that words actually have meaning or an impact on those around us. I often feel I can say anything I want, but no one who matters actually listens to my words, idea's, thoughts. Our congress men our not listening to the younger generation about what we need. We are stuck in the old, and we need new people who are actually facing these problems. It is very difficult for people who are already in power to understand what those below them need as well as how we feel. They don't wonder how am I going to pay for my next electric bill, rent, car insurance, grocieries, ect. It is all there for them. All my life I have worked so hard, graduated in 97, recieved my Associates in the Liberal Arts in 2002, and am now working on an elementary ed degree. I am working retail, and still feel like I am being pushed under. I spent my summer saving money to pay for my college tuition. I could only afford two classes. I am working on getting my books and a very expensive calculator. Everyone I meet says it is so worth it. I sit sometimes and wonder is it? Will I be able to find that teaching job? Will I still be able to get health insurance? Right now I have nothing but my thoughts of hope. Yes, I may have a roof over my head, a wonderful man who loves me, family, friends, and lucky me I can pay my bills at least for the time being, but what about my teeth, my eyes, my body, do I eat like I should? Planned Parenthood is the only place that has helped me to get my yearly check ups, and make sure I can prevent any unwanted child. Granted if I ever got prego I would definetly have it, keep it, and love it. I know thought that I need to put my education first so my child doesn't struggle like I am. I even question that, I want a girl, I would name her Arcadia, that is another dream of my. Dreams and illusions are so nice. I want to just pour out tears they would feel so good for all the dreams that I have not fullfilled. I always thought I was so strong, stay strong I say. Even my last semester, when I broke down at work over math ugh. Man, my boss said you don't have to be strong it's ok. I cried on her shoulder, so much my mother to. She is one of my best friends, and I don't think she is supose to be since she is my boss. So much is just struggling inside of me so much confusion and I am giving so much of myself away to all of you. I am so open. It's so scary. I want so much and I don't know how I am ever going to attain it. Every one says keep on working, but it hurts so much to see others gaining ahead of you all at once. You see political leaders making budget cuts, my heart doesn't think that they even give us a second thought, how we live, or any of it. We are just at the bottom of the pryimid struggling and fighting for a piece of the pie. All I want is a home, a family, and a job with good health insurance shouldn't ever American have that right?

First installment, Chapter One"The book"

A nice wind travels through my window into my dwelling. I look out into the cool june night, lightening flashing in the sky. Form here I see mostly cars in the parking lot of our apt building, but a beautiful moon is looking at me from above. The dark cumulus clouds move rapidly across the horizon. It looks like it's going to be quite the downpour, I smile. A nice long storm along with a good mystery novel to intrige my spirit for the evening. I open the window to smell the fresh air, it definetly smells like rain. I sit back in my blue Lazy Boy, a special directly from Goodwill put my feet up and open to page one.

It's your normal mystery book, I guess. A young girl mysteriously disappears from her home without warning. I'm trying to settle into it, but it just isn't keeping my upmost attention. I get up again to peer out the window. The rain hasn't even begun, lightening is present still. I sigh, sit back on my blue boy, and continue to read.

Sara is lost in the woods. She doesn't know why she is there, or who might be able to help her. She has been dumped by her captures, and abandon in the middle of a gale. The character, my character has to find shelter out of the cold. It's like Snowhite who finds the dwarfs to save her from the evil forest, I laugh. I must be the one the joke is played on because Sara knows how to make a shelter. She gathers up wood, and using the string in her back pack she makes a small hutch to sleep under. I set the book down, how though is she going to keep warm, find her way home, get out of this mess? How will her family ever find her? I want to put this piece of literature on the shelf, this is nothing new, nothing I haven't read before in fact I find it rather dull so why do I keep on reading? Still I continue on page by page as my roof is pelted with hail.

Waking up this morning was a bit hard, sara thought. I am so hungry how do I find food, water, and how am I to get out of this place? I must look for somone, surely there is a road around here somewhere over the rainbow. Get out a compass I think to her as I turn the page.

Sara searches for her watched, the one with the compass on it, so predictable, I think. Then begins to think about, as well as calculate which way the nearest highway could be. She didn't see her kidnappers nor know why they had even taken her. She didn't have any money, folks, or anything just Sara. Walking in the woods amongst the trees isn't so bad really, she tells herself. Then she notices her missing Jewel, a ring from her gradmother gone. Ok, I have to concentrate on home, the ring or home? A beautiful ring it had been of red Rubies with gold that grandmother always told her to keep with her. It was a heirloam not worth fortunes.

I set the book down, as my stomach growls "ok, ok some food for you. Milk and cookies will have to do. I just baked some this afternoon when it was warm sunny plus lots of good fuzzy come with it. I walk into my kitchen rather small it is, on the counter is my little bear jar filled with yummies. I grab two big chocolete chip cookies out, then get a large glass of milk. "Ok Tummy that should shut you up for a while," I think outloud.

At this point I was quite annoyed with this mystery, ready to throw it into the fire. Ha, Ha, I had no fire to throw this ever aggrevating book into. I eat my cookies while listening to the liquid rushing towards the earth.

I mean yah, Sara is just going to walk right to the highway, what else can she do? She has no radio, no cell phone, cell phones weren't even present in that day and age, I mean this book was written in the fifties for god sakes! How old would that make Sara?

I opened the book to finish, It was pretty short. I had about three chapters to go.......

Hope has been in my mind, in my heart, in this world, but it is not where it should be. It is not in our goverment who instead of fighting needs to work with one another in order to make this world better for everyone. People need a living wage. They need to be able to get a good education without it affedting their ability to get a home because of student loans. Our education must be more affordable everything must not be about the American dollar, but about us. Until this happens evil is here.... it's walking around with us for the devil wants us to hurt those who are below us, not hand them help, give them hope, faith, peace like our lord would want the people of this earth to do. All the poor have is each other, you are suppose to be pleased if you have a roof over your head even if it is not your own. If it is not your own someone else is benifiting and you have nothing is that right? someone to make money off another who otherwise would have no place to live, or should we be grateful to landlords who get lots of cash because without them people would be homeless? Are we suppose to worship the one who gives us crumes and will we go to hell for not doing so? Are the poor evil because they don't appriciate what the rich does for them? I wish I could answer these questions. I wish I could have some kind of accomplishment besides love, and working on a degree. Everything seems so far away, bae patient they say 27 years old, how many more years do I have to be patient to earn a decent wage to live, pay what I owe, to have one child, is this selfish?

Snuggling in my bed, I move my feet beneath the covers, it feels nice and cool among the humidity of the morning just waving into my room through the window. I try to wake up, and roll over half way in and out of dreams, wishing I could stay their safe with them in my own bed, my mind full of hope that these things can remain that I won't have to awake to the world facing all that it holds before me. My alarm clock swaks like a siren, and I sit up. I've got to get up, and to work, I tell myself this out loud. I have to pay for everything that is to sustain my life, only the air I breath is free certainly they will start charging me for that also. I turn the light on next to my bed wondering what I should wear, what is clean, does it smell good, do I have to do more laundry latter? I love this apt. and I hate that it holds me to the land lord who I pay each and every month. It seems like somehow all of the money I make goes for things that are needed, but maybe I do spend to much on myself a book here, a CD there, coffe, or a nice evening out, it all adds up to money. I shake off my sleep and grab a pair of jeans and a blouse with red leaves on it, good enough I say to myself slogging into the bathroom. I know I better take a shower or I'll feel like I am in a daze still sleeping until I make it home for dinner. I turn the shower on and head to the living room to grab my Madonna CD. She always wakes me up, and makes me feel better with her CD American Life, I love that song nothing fails, it give me hope that I can make it through my day of hanging clothing, putting it out, and or running the cash register. It is rare that I price hard goods, or am able to put them away on the retail floor. When this happens I get real exicted smile and squeal. Everyone things I'm crazy and lame for wanting a change and loving the fact that these things are things I can enjoy. I can muze through the merchindise of used goods seeking out that one special item I might buy if it is left on the floor after the 24 hr period in which we will not be fired if we buy it. I don't like the rule myself, but what can you do corporate always rains and wins!!!! I step out of the shower towel off, put on my wonderful lavender powder which is suppose to relax me, look in the mirror, and think I need to lose more weight. It's probably what every women who doesn't look like a super model thinks to herself, but we all do it. I air dry a little, grab my jeans stuff em on, then comb out my hair before added the other essentials, Man they would scream if I showed up topless, Ha Ha. I brush my hair pull it back, and brush my teeth. Then I manage to make my lunch which consists of a cup of apple sauce, usually a granola bar, juice, and maybe a treat or something. I make sure I check the weather channel waiting for my morning call from a lover, who I haven't seen in a while, I sigh as I turn off the televison. He must be cooking on the line still, or have forgotten. He's always busy in the summer at the restaraunt. Thank goodness he cooks because I am not good in the kitchen. I turn off the T.V. make sure everything is in a decent order and lock the door behind me. It's another day, another dollar ladies, and what do I do it for? The man I love, College, and my own self respect. I wonder if I will ever move out of that apt, can I make my life more then the spec it is. Then I see those lives I"ve touched, the little blessing like those customers that tell me not to give up on school. I do have those negitive moments where I think they don't know me or how I feel. I just keep telling myself: get up in the mornings, go to work, believe in yourself, stand up tall look them in the eye and know you are true not only to yourself, but man kind. It's what keeps me going, from sinking in the weight of my tears when I think nothing is moving ahead like it should be. I have to ask myself is this worth it, my soul screams yes, but my doubts are still there. They will be until I make it out alive, at least with my degree in hand, and a pat on the back from my family and friends. I wonder who will be left then, how old will I be, will I be able to still have my little girl I dream of? This makes me want to cry, my little Arcadia who I dream of. I"m scard to be a mom yes, but I want my child to have the best. This is why I struggle so, this is why I feel so deeply about my education. I know I am the only one who can make my dreams reality. It is so hard for me not to be upsett that other people's ride in life has come so easily, or faster then mine. They say you appriciate it much more then those it just comes to, I don't know if that is true. I only know that I hope Karma, God, my Goddess, or someone out there loves me enough to be my angel, to stand by me, and keep me safe in my journey.